So it's pretty obvious every new parent's main struggle is getting a sleep schedule and routine down. Many parents I talk to still sleep with their babies. Some do it because they crave that closeness, which I TOTALLY understand. Ultimately, however, nighttime is my only adult time. Also I do not sleep well when he does sleep with me. When Jackson was about three weeks old and I was drowning in a sea of flip-flopped nights and sleep deprivation, one of my best friends who was also a mom introduced me to Moms on Call. It's an online seminar that you have to pay for, but she has already subscribed and just gave me her name and password. I love her and her enabling me to be so cheap.
Since her subscription was about to run out, I hopped online, watched the appropriate seminar for his age group, took notes, and forced my grumbling husband to watch it with me because "since I have to go back to work, I'm not going to be the only one getting up with this baby, so take notes buster!" (All part of my master plan for him to let me quit my job.) The first few nights were rough, as they cautioned, but within the three nights, my 4 week old was sleeping until 2 am! Then 3 am! Then 4 am! By 8 weeks I busted in his room at 7 am to make sure he was still breathing. I think that scarred him because he hasn't slept that late since.
This continues successfully for a while until it came time to unswaddle. My friend went hardcore and unswaddled and in three nights her son was back to normal. I can't commit to three sleepless nights, so I slowly broke the swaddle. It was a long process, but with the same overall results, I feel.
Then my world came crashing down. Today at the pediatrician's office, he asked me about our bedtime routine. When I told him his night feedings are at 9 pm, he gasped in horror. Some of the horror subsided when he realized I wasn't feeing him solids at 9 pm, but I didn't have the heart to tell him the feedings START at 9 pm, by 10 pm he gets his second wind, plays for about an hour, then nurses again until he falls asleep, I let him sleep on me for 30 minutes (because he has reflux, and I have to keep him elevated after eating), and then he's in the crib around midnight. I got the picture that my routine wasn't the best. But the subscription to Moms on Call had lapsed! What to do? My friend alerted me that she had copied and pasted the text portion of the program into Word and promptly forwarded it to me. Damn she's good. If I were a dude I would marry her.
So I sat down and read the program, and realized how truly behind our routine was. I should be putting him down awake, letting him soothe himself to sleep, and he should be in bed by 9:30 according to this life-saving program. On top of that, after I close the door at 9:30, I'm not to reopen it until 7:30 am. Um....huh? Well, I have a lot of work to do.
This is the first night I'm loosely trying the program, although I'm starting full force tomorrow, because my husband will be off for three days and he can relieve me in the mornings to recoup some sleep. I put down my little nugget albeit at 10:30, closed the door, walked across the house to my room, turned on the baby monitor, and listened to his little goat-like sobs. This sucks. I would give it ten minutes of full on crying, and get him back in here to nurse him to sleep one last time. Then a miracle happened. By ten minutes the force of his cries had softened to mumbles and he was falling asleep. Suddenly I feel empowered that I may be able to do this after all!
Update:Next Day-- Jackson slept through the night and slept all the way until 8:15, at what time I busted into his room to make sure he was alive. He was. And pretty irritated I had woken him up.
**Brief note: My husband and I have decided that we don't agree with the "close the door for twelve hours, and don't go back in" mentality. I have, however, invested in a video baby monitor that I'm pretty stoked about so I can check on him more often without him seeing me. I think if crying exceeds 30 minutes, I'll go to check on him, because, according to Mom's on Call, the phase of sleep where they're still asleep but can be fussing lasts around 30 minutes.
http://www.momsoncall.com/
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